Arrrgh.

So it be talk like a pirate day.  Arrr.  I have here fer ye an excerpt from The Last Unicorn, which I love.



CAT: The Bull be going out.  He goes out every sundown to hunt for the 
strange white beast that escaped him.  You know that perfectly well, so 
don't be stupid.  (Molly picks him up.)  Har-har.  So that be a unicorn!  She 
is very beautiful.
MOLLY GRUE: How do you know she's a unicorn?
CAT: No cat out of its first fur can ever be deceived by appearances.  
Unlike human beings, who seems to enjoy it.  Ye have very little time.  
Soon there'll be a human woman in that body and no unicorn at all ever 
again.  It may be that she'll marry the good prince, who loves her.  (They 
have reached the kitchen; Molly puts the cat down on the table and rubs 
him between the ears.  He closes his eye.) Oh. Oh, purr, purr.  Do that.  Yes. 
That be nice.
MOLLY GRUE: (stops rubbing him) No.  No, that cannot be.  She is the last.
CAT: (opens his eye with an annoyed look) Well, then, she must do what she
came to do.  She must take the king's way down to the Red Bull.
(Molly grabs him and picks him up.  He lets out a squeak.)
MOLLY GRUE: Is there a way?  Tell me the way.  Tell me where we must go!
CAT: Avast!  Hark ye closely, mum.  When the wine drinks itself, when the 
skull speaks, when the clock strikes the right time.  Only then will you 
find the tunnel that leads to the Red Bull's lair, har har.  There be a trick 
to it, of course.
(He slithers out of Molly's hands and lands on his feet.)
MOLLY GRUE: Why won't you help me?  Why must you always speak in 
riddles?
CAT: Because I be what I be.  I would tell you what you want to know if I 
could, mum, but I be a cat, and no cat anywhere ever gave anyone a 
straight answer, har har. (Lifts up his eye patch to reveal a perfectly good
eye.)